Destiny Awaits - My 500 Words D23

After what seemed like an eternity, but it was probably more like five minutes, Steele finally spoke. Don’t think that I have not wondered the same thing. Those words shook me. I did not know if my heart did a somersault or if I was having a heart attack. I said, I hear a “but” coming. You do, replied Steele. But, I do not know what will come of it. We are great together. We spend quality time together. In a lot of respects we are like a couple already. I have found myself measuring my exes to you, which is probably why it does not usually work. But, I do not want to spend my life without you in it. I don’t know if I can take the risk and then us not working out.

I stopped listening have way through when I realized he had thought about us too. He had contemplated us being together. I wanted to sit on his lap and start kissing him right then and there. I had to compose myself. But, he was even sexier in my eyes, as if that was possible.

Steele, what if we can spend and even better life as a couple? It is like you said; it is almost as if we have already been dating all this time. I know how you like your coffee, I can shop for your clothes, you know what I like for breakfast, and how to make me feel better when I am down. You know things about me that I have not told a soul, the dreams that I have shared with no one other than you. I trust you with my secrets, my dreams, and my heart already. If you and when you are ready to try I will be here. I want to take the next step with you.

Steele suggested we leave the restaurant and go back to his place to talk. But, now that I know he has thought about us being together I am done talking. I want to be with him. I have been imagining what lies beneath for so long I want to see if all of my fantasies are true. I don’t think I should go. I am ready to make bad choices. I am ready to be in the moment and YOLO that shit. I have never said YOLO in my life. Something is seriously wrong with my brain. This man had turned me into a babbling idiot.

Steele got up and came behind me and gently pulled my chair. As I stood up the sweet and tangy smell of his cologne filled my lungs he was standing so close to me. I was trying to tell my lady parts not to react to his sent, to his words, to the slight grace of his hand on the small of my back. It’s too late, they noticed too. They are letting me know it is go time. But, I am pretty sure he is not ready for that leap tonight. Legs, don’t fail me now. I need you to be strong and carry me out of this restaurant. I need to see what destiny awaits. 

What Hooks You? - My 500 Words D22

The message at church this morning was “what hooks you?” The pastor explained that when Jesus was getting disciples early on he went to fisher men. Jesus himself did not fish, as he was a carpenter by trade. For example it was explained that Jesus told Andrew and Peter follow me and you will fish men. It is said that they laid their fishing net down and went with Jesus.

The pastor turned to us and asked what hooks us. People were able to get up and share what is in them right now making them work towards something or accomplishing something. Some people shared church related examples, like growing church membership. Others were more general about things that are going on but with little detail like an issue serving in jury duty and another was facing issues with the city.

I was moved to share. What I have been hooked in for at least a year now is to do free hospice pictures for families. I read in a group that I belong to on Facebook of a woman that was doing child hospices pictures in Texas. I love taking pictures and I thought what a beautiful opportunity to do for families who do not have the luxury of time.

I have been work on my dissertation and I have not worked on many things because I have been focusing on finishing. But, to do these pictures I have to be fully focused. You can’t let a family down in a situation like this. I am also afraid since I am such an emotional person. I am afraid to be crying the entire time. But, I think of the gift that they would receive and I hope I can get it together.

I am planning to see if I can work with a photo shop that will do a free picture for the family. I will also like to do a show in a gallery for any families that give me permission to use their pictures for a show. I would think it would be so moving. I just saw a story about actor John Schneider who used to be in the Dukes of Hazards and is now in the show The Haves and Have Nots. During a photo shoot for the new show the photographer said that John Schneider started to cry. The actor asked him to keep taking pictures. He shared that his father had just passed and he found out during lunch break. He continued to take the promotional pictures but could not hold it any longer. The photographer showed him the pictures and John was able to select the one he like the best. The one that he felt really represented the spirit of his father.

 That is what I would like to provide to these families but prior to the person passing away. Is having that memento of a loved one that can be cherished. Not everyone gets to have that opportunity. I know I did not with my grandmother. I wish I had. I would have meant so much to me. I hope I can give that to someone else. 

Silence - My 500 Words D21

Steele chuckled a bit, ‘your are thinking about us? What about us?’ I ignored my stomach, I ignored my body wanting to run, I ignored the fear that filled my brain. I let my heart speak. Steele, this may seem out of the blue to you but I have been feeling this way for a long time. I care for you, more than a friends’ care. I think about you, I imagine us dating.

I did not breath, I kept talking. I want us to try. Try to be together. I want to see where it can lead. I know it is scary. I have been scared for a long time to share my feelings with you. I kept thinking, what about our friendship? But, I want to try. I think we would be good together. My hands where flapping every which way, I was talking fast trying to sell us being together. I finally realize that I have rambling for a long time and Steele had not said anything. He was just looking at me.

I got scared when he was just sitting there quietly. I imagined what was going through his mind. He was probably thinking about all the reasons why we would not work. Maybe he was thinking that he was not attracted to me and now things will be awkward around me. I think he wanted to leave and ignore that this ever happened, but now he can’t. He can’t go back to ignorance bliss. He knows how I feel. I think he already knew I had feelings for him. But, since I did not say anything he could claim he did not know, or was not sure. But, now, he knows. It is true. I want you. But he is still sitting there not saying a word. I finally say something.

I am sorry Steele. I know I was talking fast and I laid a lot on your lap. I have been thinking about us for a while. I did not take it lightly, this moment. I love our friendship. I appreciate you very much. You have been a wonderful friend and very supportive of me for a long time. I can’t tell you how much that has meant to me, especially in those unsure times of my life. Like the time I finally told my mom I was never going to law school. You helped me practice the conversation. You know what; the conversation went very well because of you. I do not want to lose your friendship. But, I had to think long and hard about living one more day without sharing my feelings. I could not do it anymore.

I will understand if you need time to think about it. I will understand if you do not feel the same about me. I will understand if we can’t be friends because I have made things weird between us. I had to share my truth. I had to tell you my feelings. I hope you understand. I hope you want to try, but I will respect your decision no matter what. Steele is still sitting without saying a word. I don’t know what to do with myself right now.

Confession - My 500 Words D20

After calling Steele I sat in my car for a while. I stated to come up with a list of excuses that would sound like a good reason to cancel. I got a flat. I forgot I had a meeting. I was abducted by aliens who want me to be the queen of their planet. Nothing sounded believable. I finally started my car.

I decided to go to Millennial Park for a while. I needed the fresh air. Once I arrived at the park I found a place to see with the best possible vision of the park. There were so many couples who passed by me hand in hand. They seemed happy. Somewhere more willing to show their affection in public that others but regardless they all seems so comfortable with each other. I wondered if some day Steele and I would be in this very park. Would someone notice us and think to themselves, ‘they look so happy together.’ I prayed that would be the case.

I was in a daze. I did not realize the time until I felt my phone buzzing. Steele was letting me know he was running 15 minutes late. I got up, straighten my skirt and I walked by to the nearby restaurant where we were meeting. I walked off that what I felt was my destiny to join the fraternal order of love.

The Americana modern restaurant has big window and I saw see Steele from the corner of my eye. My stomach tightened while I tried to conjure up a pep talk but before I could organize me thoughts Steele was in front of me. I hugged him but I lingered. I hugged him a little tighter than usual. He glazed at me with a puzzled look and asked if everything was ok. I tried to shake off the nerves and pretend that everything was fine, that it was a normal day. He eyes were still squinted when the waitress came. Thank God for her timing.

Why does Steele have to be so beautiful? I am trying not to stare but he looks delicious. He is wearing a Brooks Brothers suit we picked out together. We had spent a day last fall together. We were doing some retail therapy after Steele’s last break up. Since he has loved his career more than any woman he has ever dated the break up was not particularly hard on him. But, it gave me an excuse to go out with him so I jumped on the opportunity.

Steele thanked me for inviting him out; he recognized it had been a while since the two of had gone out. He looked at me for a few moments without saying a word. I felt like half an hour but I am sure it was less than a minute. He finally broke the silence and said that it felt like something was on my mind. The moment was here. I did not know if to laugh or cry. I finally opened my mouth and the words rushed out. So fast, in fact, that he was not sure if I was speaking in English or Spanish. I smiled, slowly brushed my hair from my face and said, I have been thinking about us. 

MLK and the Good Samaritan - My 500 Words D19

Today’s church service was about Dr. Martin Luther King legacy. It was a beautiful service. It started with great music. My church has a diverse membership racially, sexual orientation, socio economic, age, etc. There are members of my congregation that experienced the civil rights movement first had. There were three people who shared experiences today for the kids in the church.

Every Sunday the kids are asked to come up to share the story. The assistant pastor shared how he was bused to school when his town became desegregated. I have not had that experience being born in Puerto Rico in the 70s. My husband in the other hand has had experiences because he was born in the 70s also but in Mississippi. He recalls being young and having crosses burned in his front lawn. I can’t fathom having that happen to me.

The closest experience I had was when I moved to Michigan from Puerto Rico at the beginning of 8th grade year. My brother and I are 10 months apart but we attended school together since pre-kindergarten. I was a very sociable child and my mom said that she felt comfortable sending me to school with my brother even though I was younger. When we move to Michigan we moved in with my aunt and uncle first. When my parents found a home they did not want to change our middle school halfway through the year. We used to go to our aunt and uncle’s house after school but once the weather got nicer, then 1987, my brother and I started walking home. I do not know how far it was but I believe it was at least a 45 minute walk.

One day, as my brother and I were walking a car passed us going the opposite direction. There were two White men in the car and the one on the passenger side, who was the one closed to us, stuck his arm out and yelled White power. I did not know anything about the history of racism in the United States at that time but in the pit of my stomach I knew that he was not just stating his White pride. It felt angry, threatening. I later came to learn that what the man did with his arm was a Nazi salute.

I had additional experiences in college personal and others of friends. My college best friend, who is Black, and I were walking to the store when a car with two White guys drove passed us. The guy in the passenger side said I like chocolate as they went by. Latter a friend I met while she was moving in during her freshman year had a sing put in her dormitory door telling her to go back to Mexico. In my anthrobio class there was a White student who was talking about how people in third world countries are happy about companies coming in and allowing them to make money. She did not understand about the after effects of companies putting maquiladoras and then leaving in shambles when they found another country with cheaper labor.

The saddest part is the recent acts of racial ignorance going on around the world. The Obama election is a perfect example with the posters of him as a monkey. It is ridiculous have in this day and age, there is still racial discrimination. I remember taking my daughter out to Starbuck when she was a baby, maybe three months old a young White teen girl walked in. I looked at her and thought she was such a cute girl. Then I turned and looked at my beautiful Black daughter and I thought to myself, the world is going to treat her differently because of the color of her skin. I know this to be true because little had changed as to how Black women are viewed in this country in my life time. I do not trust that much will change for her. So now I invest my time in building her up and preparing her for those people who are going to make her feel ugly and less than. When I was in high school a classmate that is half Black and Half Puerto Rican thought I was beautiful and told me every time he got a chance. One day our class met at the library. He knew a guy from another class and he turned to him and said look at her isn’t she beautiful? The White guy looked me up and down and said, No! He destroyed me. Now the guy who had spent the entire term telling me how beautiful I was did not impact me as much as the one guy I had never met.

I do not want my beautiful daughter to feel the way I did. I tell her now, at five, that some people will think she is pretty and some will think she is not and that is ok. The important part is that she loves herself and that she knows we think she is beautiful.

I am grateful to be in a church that acknowledges race and social justice. I church that recognizes that the struggle is still happening for people of color, for the LGBTQ community, and for the socially disadvantaged. The sermon today was based on both MLK and the story of the Good Samaritan. MLK imagines that the men who did not help the man robbed asked themselves, ‘if I stop to help this man, what will happen to me?’ In contrast the Good Samaritan asked himself, ‘If I do not stop to help this man, what will happen to him?’

Experiences like the ones I had or witnessed or worse what my husband saw as a child could easily make us jaded. We could think about how it impacts us and decided if we should really get involved. But, God calls us to be the Good Samaritan and think of others beyond ourselves.

Story Line - My 500 Words D18

I am taking Jasmine and Steve to lunch. I need their help with the Steele situation. Ok, so it is not a situation since it is all in my head but I need their help nonetheless. I am hoping that they will give me advise about how to tell Steele how I feel about him. I hope they have some words of wisdom for me.

It is a sunny autumn day in Chicago. I should be out shopping and enjoying my day. Instead I am headed to Lincoln Park to meet Jasmine and Steven. I need Jasmine to focus and not be “funny” today. She loves to tell gross stories about her client skin disorders. I am in no mood for that. I was so anxious that I got to the restaurant early.  We are meeting in a fondue place with a Mediterranean feel. Our booth’s wall is lined with bottles of wine. I wish I drank every single one of them. It is the first time I am going to say, out loud, that I am in love with Steele.

Jasmine arrives first. She is wearing a little cashmere camel color sweater.  It brings out her hazel eyes. She is five feet five and but her presence is six five. Five minutes later in walks Steve. He promptly informs us that he is hung over. I don’t need this today. Jasmine asks where Steele is. I let her know he is not coming but that he is the reason I have asked them to join me.

The three of us are sitting in silence. Finally Jasmine asked what was going on with Steele. I finally let it out, “I have feelings for him.” Him who? asked Steve. I respond, Stelle! trying not to sounds annoyed that I had to specify the name.  STELLE? they ask in unison. I got out a yes that was barely a whisper. What about Stephanie? Asked Steve. Are you serious right now Steve. I just told you that I love Steele and you bring up Stephanie? YOU LOVE HIM? in unions once again. I don’t know how to tell him and I need your help. What do you think?

Jasmine asked me if I was worried about our friendship. Of course I am. That is why I have not said anything all this time. Steve, you are his best friend. You have known him the longest. Has he ever said anything about me? Do you think he would be receptive? Steve explained that Steele is focused on his career. He has dated but nothing too serious. His career is his first love. I know he cares about you but I can say it is more than that said Steve. Well, if you were me, what would you do? You only live once. If you love him tell him. Jasmine was firm. What do you think Steve? I do not know how he will take it. But, I am a big proponent of speaking my truth, perhaps it is time you spoke yours, tell Steele.

I have put it out there in the universe and I survived. Jasmine and Steve did not discourage me from telling him. It is time to speak my truth about Steele to Steele. I pick up my cell and stare at it for a few minutes. I thought my body was frozen but my fingers managed to move. My text read, how about dinner tonight you and I. There is no turning back. 

Back Story - My 500 Words D17

I am the youngest of three and the only one who went to college. My mother graduated law school top of her class and has been defending the innocent (and not so innocent) for years. As far back as I can recollect she pushed me to be a lawyer. And as far back as I can remember I never had any interest, not even a little, for law. Bless her heart, my mother kept trying and she went all out when I got to college. Imagine her surprise and disappointment when I told her I wanted to do Public Relations. She has not let it go, even now that I am a Vice President at one of the largest PR firms in Chicago.

In spite of being a disappointment to my mother, I love my job. I have enjoyed great success and I am looking forward to my career growth. Another disappointment in my mother’s life is the fact that I am very much single and all of 37 years of age. My beautiful mother’s new past time is sending me information on fertilization options. She does not care anymore that I am not married she just wants a grandchild from her only daughter. It is not that I do not want to reproduce. It is that I have been secretly in love with my friend Steele for years. I have tried dating but I find fault in every man I met. No one comes close to Steele’s qualities.

I have imagined myself telling him how I feel. I play different scenarios in my mind. Most of the time I imagine that it will ruin our friendship, then I wait yet another day and I have yet to say anything. I am feeling pressure to make a move because our “fiend” Stephanie likes Steele as well. She is more forthcoming about how she feels and she flirts with him every chance she gets. Since I can’t jumper and pull her hair out leaving her bold, because then I would be wrong, I have to seriously think about telling Steele how I feel.

My mother would love Steele since he is a lawyer. But his successful career pales in comparison to how beautiful he is. He is sexy and we would have beautiful babies. He is six feet three. His hazelnut brown skin makes me want to take a bit. I imagine that he tastes just like Nutella, which I have also loved for a long time. If I close my eyes I can not only imagine him holding me but I can almost feel his arms and muscles around me. Now, if I can just get the words to come out of my mouth. If only I could muster the strength. I love you Steele! Four simple words, four beautiful words, four words that will shape my future happiness. I can’t say them. But, if I don’t say them, what will that mean. I will hate myself if he ends up with Stephanie. Let’s be real, I will hate myself if he ends up with anyone. I have to tell him. 

Characther Development - My 500 Words D16

 

1.                  Physical Details about the character: Is he/she short, tall, thin, old, etc?

Steele Adams is a 35 years old trial lawyer. He is six three, slender but fit. I have found myself staring at him when he takes off his suite jackets. His shirts tell me that there is a surprise that lies beneath. I would love to find it, undoing his shirt one button at a time. The silhouettes of his muscles make me feel a range of emotions. First I feel safe. Then I feel like I should play a damsel in distress so that he can rescue. Then I am mad at myself because I don’t do the damsel thing. I am trying to figure out a way for him to hold me in his arms. Maybe I should pretend I am chocking. But what if he is not CPR certified? That idea could backfire. I am going to figure something out.

2.                  Physical environment surrounding the character: Is he/she on a desert island, in an urban community, living in the mountains, etc?

Steele is as successful as he is handsome. His office is located on the 35^th floor of the Willoughby Tower on Michigan Ave. The pictures on his wall are a roaster of who is who in Chicago. But the true story of his success is on his desk and book case. He has awards that chronicle his journey to the 35^th floor. I love that he has not let his success get to his head. I like walking to his window and looking out on the city. Everything seems so small and fair way. I can lose myself in this view. I mainly dream of Steele and I together, if only I could get out of the friend zone.

3.                  The other characters surrounding the character: What kinds of people does the character associate with?

We have a tight-knit group of friends who we are on our way to meet. Jasmine Cabrera is a dermatologist. She shares the most graphic stories about her clients’ skin deceases. I am glad when she does not join us so that I do not have to hear her stories. I think she shares tells us about her cases on purpose just to make me mad. Steve Collins is a cardiologist, which is ironic given that he is always given heart attacks to these little girls around here. He likes to love them and leave them which results in a trail of broken hearts and tears. The person the ruins our group is Stephanie Malone. She is an Assistant Principal at a private school in the city. I can tell that she also likes Steele. She is shameless when it comes to him; always touching him and flipping her hear. He is not funny but not that funny but she laughs extra loud. She is a problem in my world.

4.                  The things that the character does: Does he/she go to school, fly an airplane, eat pizza every night for dinner, etc?

I am a Public Relations vice president. I love my job because it fun but also flexible. It allows me to meet Steele for lunch once or twice a month. I like going to court and watch him at work. He is so passionate. I sit back and imagine what that passion must feel like outside of the courtroom. Then I realize that I am blushing and I try to think about other things like reading the bible to my grandma. I have to set myself straight but his sexiness makes it hard. Sweet Lord, how can I make him love me? I am not catholic but I am stopping by church and light a candle tonight. I need divine intervention here.

5.                  The things that the character says or thinks: These things reveal the character’s feelings and opinions about things.

Today’s lunch was intense. Steele decided to share that he feels he is at a good place in his life and career. However, he feels that he is missing out since he is not sharing his life and success with someone. My mind is rising because I can’t let this opportunity pass me by. I am worried about what it would mean for our friendship. But, I don’t want to be just friends. I don’t know what to do. If Steele is telling me this, it is a matter of time before Stephanie finds out. I am making my move. I have to take a chance and tonight is the night.

Challenge Thus Far - My 500 Words D15

The writing challenge has been going great so far. It has been interesting to realize how hard it is to write 500 words on some days but so easy on others. Certainly the topic has a lot to do with it. When I wrote about my grandmother I had over a thousand words easily. However, some of the other topics I was watching word count.

I have been doing some of the topics from the challenge. But, mainly I have been trying to practice painting a picture and setting the mood. I want readers to visualize and feel. When I read stories or novels the ones I love the most are the ones that transport me to the place the writer is describing. Where I can imagine what the place looks like, what the characters look like, when I am invested in their lives (even knowing that they are not real people).

I found a couple of pictures to illustrate sunrays and a foggy road. I came up with a backdrops story as to how I got to those places. Then I attempted to describe what I saw and what it made me feel. I felt that exercise was fairly successful. However, the one yesterday, talking about food, I felt that I could have done better on. I did a good job describing the items and ingredients but not a good job selling their appeal. I should have thought back to those cooking channels I watch as to how they talk about food or maybe the novel “Like Water for Chocolate.”

With the time I have left I think I am going to try my hand at writing in Spanish. While I am originally from Puerto Rico and my first language is Spanish I have not written in my native language very often since moving to the states. That will be a good practice. I think setting the scene and painting a picture will be easier in Spanish. We are more descriptive and romantic (and wordy). In English there is this need to get to the point, “spit it out already” if you will. In Spanish that is not the case. We love talking and describing things. We do not leave out any part of the story.

Maybe that is my key to achieving better English descriptions; it is to think in Spanish. What would I say and then translate. I think about Spanish love songs how they describe romance and the love of a man for a woman so differently than English songs. One song by Son by Four called Cuando Seas Mia (when you are mine) the lead singer describes the things he will do to this woman once she is his. He states that he is going to love her from the arch of her eyebrow on down. I mean, who says that? It is incredibly sexy! I have never heard that in English love songs. I need to bring the Latino sexy to my English writing.  

Another nice part of this challenge has been reading some of the things other individuals have been writing. It is nice to be in a community of writers. I have not had that before. It is nice to see people share resources and techniques without expecting anything in return with people who are for the most part strangers. I have gotten further this time around than the last time I attempted a writing challenge. This is exciting. I just need to take the next step and being to write the books I have been thinking about and the one screen play. I have to keep the passion and discipline going!

Puerto Rican Food - My 500 Words D14

I love food, perhaps a little too much. But what I love the best is Puerto Rican food. I am a bad Puerto Rican because I am not a good cook. Since it never tasted like my mom’s I just gave up. But I love to eat it, when it is made with love and seasoned right!

One thing about Puerto Rican food is that it is not spicy. I think people assume because it is Latino it is spicy. People in the US are used to Mexican food and they assume it is all the same. We do hot sauce on the side for people who like it spicy but the food itself it is not. Staples in Puerto Rican food are rice, beans, pork, and plantains. I love arroz con gandules (rice with pigeon peas).

The rice is cooked in a caldero, which is a cast iron pot. It is seasoned with seasoned with sofrito and sazón. Sofrito is a blend of herb, spices, and sweet pepers some people make it from scratch while other buy the Goya sofirito. Sazón helps with the flavor as well as the coloring. The color comes from the achiote or azafran. I only use Goya sazón. Some people make arroz con gandules with ham and adobo which is heavy on the sodium. I personally do not use them when I make my rice (which is not often).

Ricans love pork. Sweet Lord it is so good!! One traditional dish is pernil. Pernil is a pork shoulder. When made right, pernil is moist and flavorful. I have only made it once and I used my father’s recipe with a garlic and olive oil marinade with onions and green peppers. His is much better than mine. Some people make it with adobo but again it is high on sodium. Pork is naturally salty and to me it does not need any more salt. I cook with garlic and onion powder versus salt.

Plantains are also a big part of Puerto Rican cuisine. They can be made green or ripe. Green plaintins are cut into slices, dipped in salt water, and deep freed twice the first in the slices, the second after they have been flattened. These are called tostones. They are crispy but moist and soft in the middle. Riped plantains are also sliced and freid but they remain soft. They are sweet. Platanos maduros (riped plaintais) are my favorite. I like the sweetness against the seasoned food.

Being form an island we also enjoy our coconut. There is a coconut dessert called tembleque de coco. It is a coconut custard. It is chilled and topped with cinnamon. It is very smooth and not overwhelmingly sweet. It is just right and one of the best ways to end a Puerto Rican meal.

I just made myself very hungry thinking about all of the delicious Puerto Rican food I know and love. I need to put more effort into cooking it. It is like my mom says, the more I practice the better I will get. I have no excuse after all; my mom has sent me cookbooks in English and in Spanish. I just need to get in touch with my inner chef. 

My Day - My 500 Words D13

My day sated out with a sick baby. When I went to get my daughter out of the shower she was crying. She had spent the entire night coughing. She did not sleep well and was not in a good space. Poor thing! I got her back in bed and my husband said that he would stay with her. I gave her a kiss bye and she felt warm. When I checked her temperature she had a 103 fever. I gave her medicine, kissed her again, and headed to work. I hated to leave her. She is five and is such a big girl but when she gets sick I remember how little she still is.

I got to work and started my morning in meetings, one with my supervisor to go over work assignments. There are a lof of projects on our list of things to do. The second meeting was a management team meeting with our division. We did updates from the different areas. We spent a good time of our time taking about onboarding another community college. My community college is the biggest in the state. We have over 90,000 per year. The college that will come under us as they become an official college has 2,000. We have just transitioned two colleges who received accreditation by the state. We were making a list of the things we need to do and the questions that must be answer before the contract is signed.

After lunch I headed to another campus for the last meeting of the day. I am part of a committee that is putting together a one stop center. The aim of the one stop is to have an area where students can visit self-help computers to conduct student business with over the shoulder help if needed. The center opened on December 30^th and many students have been using the computers. They are learning to navigate the portal and conduct college business such as paying their bill and ordering parking permits on their own. It is taking the teaching how to fish approach. We have three other centers that will be opening district-wide. The next is due to open summer 2014. We have been in this committee for over a year. I think most of us are worn down. The two hour meeting seemed to draw on. I personally had spaced a few times during the meeting. I am taking over this committee for the next center so I need to have the energy for the next center rollout.

This will be a great opportunity. While a lot of the work had already been done since we rolled out the first center there is still a lot of work to be done on the next campus. There are new stakeholders to bring together and get them through the process. In the next campus there has been a lot of remodeling to the space where the center will be. It will give the campus a new feel and a new way of directing students. Thais will be different from the first campus. It is an exciting time for the college and for student services. 

Baptism - My 500 Words D12

Today in church the pastor talked about Jesus’ baptism. As she shared the story I tried to imagine how amazing the sight must have been of Jesus being baptized in the Jordan river and the clouds parting and the sun rays coming down. It must have been a sight.

As she was sharing the story I thought about my baptism. I remember it because I was maybe 6 or 7. I recall it was not during the regular service. There were only six of us and the father. It was my parents and my Godparents along with their daughter who was a baby. The baby and I were both baptized on that day. I do not remember what was said but I do remember the feeling of the water on my forehead. It was cold! I remember seeing a picture of that day. I had one a white dress, white socks and white Maryjane shoes. Thinking back, my dress was a bit short for a baptism.

I did not get baptized a second time as an adult but I did renew my faith a few years back. I joined a new church after a few years of not going to church. I found a really good fit when I joined Ainsworth United Church of Christ. It is an open and affirming congregation that focuses on social justice. I love this church because it goes beyond the word of Christ to actually working in our church and our community.

To renew my faith I had to go through a number of classes with our Pastor. There were five of us in class. There was a couple who had a daughter close to the same age as my baby girl who at the time was about one and a half. Ed was also part of our group.

I am not sure how old Ed was but I can tell you that he was about 5’ 6”, a full head of white hair (always neatly combed), he wore glasses, and he had a very thin frame. During one of our meetings Ed shared that while he was deployed his then wife lost the baby she was carrying. As he shared this story, he cried. I imagined it had been at least fifty years since the child’s passing. I learned that day that no matter how much time passes, you will never get over the death of a child. As Ed’s health deteriorated over the past few years, he still served as an usher at church. It was inspiring to see faithfulness and stewardship personified in Ed.

Ed passed away on December 25, 2014. His passing serves as another reminder of how fleeting. Sometimes you do not realize the impact someone has on you until they are gone. But, being baptized you are cleansed and have publicly committed your life to God. I was able to see Ed dedicate that last few years of his life to God. I was able to see his dedication and commitment to his faith and the Lord. The water of life cleansed Ed and now he is in the house of God. The water cleansed me and I trust my life in God’s hands. S/he has shown me love and compassion and I will continue to walk in her/his name.